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a live and kickin'

Apr. 2nd, 2006 | 09:40 pm
mood: blahblah
music: Jay Chou-外婆

ya, so basically, i spend a week just chilling~~~and pigging out,...right now is the beginning of another school quarter, and another month,...i am going on a strict diet and making improvemnts..i prolly gained like so many pounds that i ain't gonna think about...focus on school, weight family and friends.....dir en grey concert was such a great day,...even though there were rude pple, but i had a helluva time. they gotta come again soon~~ hyde is coming in july this year at anaheim, maybe i should go see him too! i dunno yet....i don't listen to his solo stuff except Hello....which was a really nice pv and song :D. wish me luck pple...here goes nothing~~

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i survived another quarter

Mar. 22nd, 2006 | 10:29 pm
mood: blahblah

yes finally done with finals!! to be honest, i don't care about how i did on my math or phys final because i know that i a passing..but DOC ....T^T sighs oh well, i guess i taught myself a lesson not to slack off again~~

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omg,.....finals, concert,spring break,...and DIETING

Mar. 17th, 2006 | 10:18 pm
mood: annoyedannoyed

OMG there are too many stuff going on at once right now. i can't wait to get my finals over and done with at the end of next week. Then Dir en grey concert at LA on the 23rd. i am determined to be active and lose weight at a concert/....i better burn some crazy amount of cal. i should go get a swim suit becuase i should go to the indoor swimming pool at my school more frequently. swimmming is some sport i actually enjoy to do...i should take every opportunity. these past 10 weeks have been the lowest of the low in terms of my diet and academics....it cannot happen ever again! spring here i come!! anyhow, the next time i see my friends from high school, its gonna be a new me....i don't care if my bone sticks out and look like a 40 year old.....as long as i am skinny!! i need learn not to binge then take laxatives because i don't want my body to become so dependent on the medicine. i should start taking fiber pills instead. i also need a mirror in my room...i know, i have no body mirror,...shame shame shame....and ya so, i need that new addition to my dorm room. what else is there to say, ....ya life sux and its a bitch like always~

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fuck doc and grades

Mar. 16th, 2006 | 11:39 am
mood: depresseddepressed

...ya i realized that the best grade i can possibly get is a B in the class, which it would drop my GPA .1 points. my ta gave me a very stupid and low c for my 2nd paper. i have to admit ya it was pretty last minute, but i didn't expect a 73. this paper completely screwed up my grade and everything and its a 6 unit class. i have to ace the final...like 100% to only get a solid B.....this so pisses me off.....i am stupid and like so lazy this quarter...i suck at writing, so i cannot possibly ace a writing final. so i pray that i get like a B- i could just get a B- in the class, i get 3.1 cumalative GPA...next quarter i neeed to work my butt off ....sighs* omg i can't believe how pooor i did this quarter...so depressing

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yes, i am still alive

Mar. 15th, 2006 | 02:33 am

yes pple i am still alive and kicking...my friend india came and visit and i just totally pigged out becuase i don't want to be a party pooper. so when i came back, i took some lax and i didn't think much into it because it doesn't work very well for me. but this morning, my section was cancelled and right before work my stomach starts to hurt and i lost ke 1.5 after i came back from the bathroom....and i was half dead when i got to work.....and felt like shit for the rest of the day..i am suppose to study and do friggin hw! but obviously it isn't happening....so anyhow~~ ya my weight ain't moving no where...which is really sad~~

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still alive and kicking~

Mar. 12th, 2006 | 01:09 pm
mood: sadsad
music: Alicia Keys- A Woman's Worth

.. i know i haven't been updating for a couple of days....im just out of it.....finals are creepin' up, and i am not even close to being focused...and yes,m i still weigh the same.....sighs*....

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which type

Mar. 9th, 2006 | 11:31 pm
mood: distresseddistressed
music: D'espairs Ray-月の記憶-fallen-

i am trying to determine which type of yoga class to take. but i dunno which type burns more cal. maybe i'll stop by the book store to find out~~ i need to lose more weight~!!

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dieting on hold for now

Mar. 6th, 2006 | 08:56 pm
mood: blankblank
music: Kodou-dir en grey

dieting is ok~~ right now i need to be more focused on school. if i get Cs in my class i am going to die. so diet should just be minimalized for now....school is more important right now..2 weeks to finals, i have to be focused

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....damn fine dining!

Mar. 2nd, 2006 | 12:33 am

sighs* i did so bad today that it sux........in the afternoon i was 111 because of my lunch. my suitemate and i went to get fine dining and i ate at at 6...and i weigh 113 now, 113! i haven't weigh that much inWEEKS WEEKS!! its either i start fasting ur like slice my fat off myself, or win a lotto so i can afford lipo. i swer i am so sick of being fat. and i have to take other people's crap by calling me a moron for no reason...that bitch should fucking die of obesity.....suffer slowly with diabetes, high cholestrol, blood pressure, and heart failure.

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acceptance and rejection

Feb. 27th, 2006 | 08:04 am
mood: pissed offand also tired
music: n/a

okay, so i joined a few new groups this week so i can seek for some acceptance and finally found people that felt the same way i do. but guess what, i am not good enough for them. what and how does that suppose to make me feel. go ahead that read the comment she made, so she is superior than me because she is skinner.you know what this makes me so angry and sad at the same time. just when u think that a person has something constructive to say. "just eat sensibly and exercise"....well no shit sherlock if that worked out then i wouldn't even be here in the first place....i am contemplatig to wheter to be scarcastic in my comment....

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